8 Musts When Working Out As a Mom

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Do you remember those college days at the gym? You know, where your gym clothes were so tight and hot they were more like an invitation than an attempt to stay cool and flexible during a sweat? When it was just as important to have your hair and make-up perfect as it was to be fashionable while using the thigh master? Whether you worked out alone, or as a harem, college fitness was a mating call, a dance that just happened to keep you tight and firm at the same time.

Fast forward a few years, after you’ve squeezed a few lovelies out of your hooha, and you see a much different story.

1. Tie Up Those Boobies- In college you were concerned about your bra matching your booty shorts. These days your milk jugs have fed any number of children and you’re more worried about containment than drawing attention with your jiggling. Strap on an extra sports bra, mama, those babies are uncomfortable when they wobble.

2. Avoid Leakage- I’m sorry, did you say jump rope? Ok cool, just give me a second to pee. No amount of keagles can keep you from peeing your pants when you’re jumping up and down for God knows how many minutes. Remember when the light of your life ripped through your body to emerge in a heap on your chest? Yeah, that moment; the moment your learned what love was, also destroyed your hooha and all surrounding tissue….giggle=pee, sneeze=pee, jump rope=double pee.

3. Do Push-Ups- The dreaded push-up is perhaps the best, and most difficult move for manywp_20161102_003 women. This ab killer, shoulder destroyer, and thigh cruncher, will tone the front of your bod like nothing else. It sucks. Add a tiny human to the mix and you have yourself hell on earth. As soon and you plant yourself in plank, your little one will think, “play time!” If push-ups weren’t hard enough add another 20-50lbs on your back.  This extra weight block is also unstable, teetering and ready to roll for a giggle, your abs and frustration will be on fire! Keep pushing mama, you can do it.

4. Embrace Distractions- Pre-children your workout regime could last as long as you wanted to see and be instagramcapture_236c1043-a2a1-4a00-8a04-c1f40e8710bdseen. You could pump iron all day with a smile on your perfectly colored and glossed lips.  Now you can’t have 2 minutes to pee alone, much less get fit. As soon as you really get into your routine someone tiny will need to poop and you are required to wipe that butt if you don’t want a gallon of TP in the pot. Halfway through, your kids will begin to fight or one will run into a wall and need a hug. SIGH. Trust me, the more you do it the quicker you will get at quelling baby riots, but they will never stop…

5. Let It Go- Once upon a time all your hormones did was emit sexy vibes and pheromones, now GAS.  Since day one of conception all those little devils have been seriously out of whack, and I’m not convinced they will ever recover. You won’t see college hotties belching after burpees or tooting during squats after Taco Tuesday…But you’re a mom, you don’t have time to care or the energy to clench up.

6. Do Box Jumps- Jumping again? Fine, peeing again.

7.  Relax It’s Just Exhuastion-  Don’t freak yourself out by reminiscing about your pre-mama energy level. Yes, there was a time you could do 1,000 jumping jacks and giggle while an entire fraternity cheered your perky, bouncy self on.  Present day you, by contrast, hasn’t slept in years, is emotionally stretched, has coffee for breakfast and still struggles with back pain from that baby that lived inside you for 9 years, I mean months. Trust me, your workout will give you more energy in the end but it’s gonna SUCK getting there! Some days 30 minutes of sit ups, bench press, squats, etc. feels like death on a stick.

This is my "take one more picture and you're dead" face
This is my “take one more picture and you’re dead” face

8. Put On Your Ugly Face- We already touched on how amaze-balls you once looked while searching for Mr. Right, or maybe just Mr. Right Now, at the gym a million years ago. Screw her. Today, you have to squeeze what once took hours, into 30 minutes. Any more than that and kids will start to lose their minds.  Thus you have to work EXTRA hard to get what you want out of your workout. So strap on your ugly face and roar on through. You won’t be making flirty, wink eyes at anyone while you grunt and groan through pull-ups and the dreaded burpee.

Yup, your workout regime, and goals, have definitely changed since popping out babies. Fitness is important to our mental and physical health though, so keep on peeing through those jumps and grunt through the minions on your back during push-ups. You’re a freaking rock star!

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36 thoughts on “8 Musts When Working Out As a Mom

  1. Hahaha….I was already laughing at the photo. I remembered trying to do sit ups and my kids wanted to “help” me by pushing me up. Everything changes so dramatically after you have kids, you just have to improvise. And yes, it’s always about the pee-ing, isn’t it? If it’s not you, it’s the kids…Hahaha…this post really had me in stitches. #bigpinklink

    1. my kids like to act as weights for hip raises and sit on my stomach while doing sit ups….so helpful! -Brandi with Big Fit Fam

  2. I love this!! I haven’t yet got to working out after having Oscar but I remember doing it after Zach and this is all so true! It’s going to be so much fun next time now I’ve had a natural birth. I have enough trouble with a cough!! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

    1. Haha! the cough/sneeze tinkle is so annoying! LOL. thankfully that has finally gone away for me, but i still can’t do jumps! -Brandi with Big Fit Fam

  3. HaHa! Well… I don’t think I have intentionally done a work out since before the little one came along. How do you fit everything in? 🙂 #DreamTeam

    1. it’s a struggle! But working out is something that, even when i don’t want to do it, it makes me FEEL better physically and emotionally, so I always find a way to fit it in. -Brandi, Big Fit Fam

  4. Thanks for reminding me how much I really need to get back into my working out. I was doing so good at the beginning of the year and even hit it hard at the end of summer but here about the last month I just don’t know where my stamina went. You look great! Keep up the good work and thanks for linking up with #monsterslink :))

    1. motherhood is a battle of exhaustion! There are so many days when I can barely pull myself out of bed, especially if it’s abusy day, or someone is sick…You can do it though! -Brandi, Big Fit Fam

  5. Haha, this is great! I’ve been putting off working out for far too long and now I feel worse for it!

    Things are going to change as of Monday – I’m at a party tonight unfortunately but I’m motivated and have graduation in a few weeks!

    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes

    Janet 🙂

    1. It’s so easy to slip into a routine of not working out, but you can do it! It always makes me feel less cranky and tired when i buckle down and do it! Good luck! -Brandi, Big Fit Fam

  6. Ha Ha Can totally relate to a few of these. My toddler does sometimes try to imitate me but then it is so cute to watch him that I tend to stop to do that or take pictures and then he stops too. Otherwise, just like in one of your pics above, he will be all over my back and not let me do a thing! Oh fun #ablogginggoodtime

  7. Ha ha, brilliant. I’ll never forget my first go on a trampoline post children!, bouncing is definitely not my friend!
    #Momsterslink

  8. I don’t dare do a pushup without the kids around me, much less with them around. Your kid-filled plank is definitely impressive!

  9. You made me smile as I think I have done/experienced all of the things you talk about. I have to wee before I start a workout, during and after – its a nightmare as well as trying to exercise with Mia walking around me trying to get my attention! I gave up in the end 🙂

    #PicnMix

    1. For sure! My husband knows to give me time to go before doing any sort of jumping! otherwise i will be stopping mid workout to change my pants! Thank you for reading! -Brandi with Big Fit Fam

  10. So very true! Star-jumps are no longer my friend, and as for my tight abs… hahahahahaha. Now I just have a saggy pouch that I have to try and tuck into my (ultra scratty) jogging bottoms. I have time to exercise or wash clothes. Not both. It’s all about priorities! 😉 x #Momsterslink

    1. which is prob why i am always behind on laundry, lol. I need to workout just so i don’t kill anyone! Thank you for visiting! -Brandi with Big Fit Fam

  11. Hahaha…so true! I remembered how uncomfortable I felt while exercising when I was still breastfeeding my kids. But you do always have an audience though. My kids used to think it was a game when I started to exercise. #bigpinklink

  12. I love this – it’s so true! Thankfully Piglet isn’t at the stage of climbing on me when I’m doing push ups yet, he lies beneath me as my motivation to not give up and drop because I’d fall on him haha #bigpinklink

    1. I loved doing pushups with a baby under me! mine is too wiggly now but i would always get a kiss every time i went down and they would giggle as i went back up! Thanks for visiting BigFitFam!

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